Love is.

Love is...

... seeing my pop walking my mom down the isle in a very simple church blessing after 27 friggin' years!!! (",)

Today is very special for my oppa and omma as they renewed their vows of 'I Do's' with God as their witness. Mom and pop were never married in the church; just like any other stupid (ooopsss...) young couples, they rushed to having their civil wedding when mom learned that she's a few months pregnant with my sister. But I guess they weren't stupid because they are still together [amid the rollercoaster years of splitting up and making up... the endless fights, especially when pop is a little... okay, totally boozed and mom's nagging is at its peak] and our family is still intact. I remember mom telling us countless times before that she's going to leave pop. First was when I was still in prep, then middle school then... basta, I guess that supposed-to-be-heartbreaking warning just became one of mom's usual threats whenever she's pissed off with the old man. It was nothing really big for us. Now, we're all working, probably living each of our own lives although under one roof, and they're still as sweet as couples in their honeymoon stage. Of course, there are still fights, tears and disappointments but they are facing it together -- with us.

Thank God for this. Pop and mom’s love is magic; a miracle that has been made. I swear our family is not a picture perfect one but, again, God has his wonders. It’s even weird that we are not as solid as other families when it comes to religion but we have one faith. And I guess that is enough to hold our bond much stronger.

More photos here.

The 'Ogre' strikes again

What do you call a person who has a habit of saying things point blank and taking them back three seconds later? I don't know with you guys, but I just find them extremely annoying. Apart from my growing dislike about work, I am getting more and more annoyed by the 'ogre' whom I was actually referring to here at the beginning of this blog.

Yesterday, we had a meeting and just like the same old sh*t I hear from him time and again, I got all the more confused about what are we supposed to do now. I know I am being the bad guy here since he actually asked us if we are clear about our agenda but I didn't dare ask. It's pointless. It's like daring Pacquiao for another boxing match. I'll get psyched out 'till my ego is beaten black and blue and barely breathing. Believe me, between us two, an argument is a word that SHOULD not exist. At least until I find a new job.

I promised myself to be productive; its not fair to vent my mounting loathing about him or of this company on my work output. I even have to prove myself more. So this morning, [even without the momentum I so used to have] I mustered up writing long been overdue articles and send out long been overdue email replies and follow-ups. But to my dismay, he called me and demanded a decision on where do we want to transfer. Yes, by the way, I am saying goodbye to my forever seatmate Wayne (who hasn't been so kind.. tee-hee... kidding...) because the AQ Team has to be together at one area in the office. Ergo, I'm leaving my precious little nook here at the corner; I feel a little sad and excited [about my new working area] at the same time. Anyway, he's asking us to find a place that we want to occupy but every time we point out something, he'll tell us those places are out of the question already. Meaning, untouchable. Gulo eh! It looks like we'll have to settle for the Training Group's area. Haayy...

But in fairness to the 'Ogre', he hasn't been actually that scary and grumpy as before. As Chinchin and the others suspect, he's probably in-love. Yaikks! Honestly, I wish him well about his lovelife if it would mean no psyching out and ego-depletion for us his aliping sagigilids. I just wish he'd stop making things difficult for us, or at least for me. I wish I'd never have to feel disgusted everytime he talks to me or I wouldn't have to anticipate another extreme bashing everytime he's asking about the magazine.

Whenever I go hiding under my seat when he passes by my cubicle, I tell myself that it is the most stupid thing that a person can do -- not literally hide and tuck themselves to the safe confines of their cubicles but feel inferior to another person. Sure, he's a boss, he's the king of this company but we have to remember that without us, this [office] would just be another box in a highrise along the posh Ayala Avenue.

Weekend

Hmm... Good morning Monday!

My horoscope says something interesting:

Your single status has some sexy surprises in store for you once you let yourself enjoy where you're at instead of wondering about the future. Commit to loving this mode of life and you'll have more zest than a lemon.

Nice.

So how long will I have to enjoy this single momenthood? Hehe.

***

Sunday wasn't exactly a rest day. I went with my mom to the 168 / Cluster Mall in Divisoria. She did some 'shopping' for their Church Blessing on the 28th. I could tell she's really excited. Pop might be feeling the same way too but he's just not the type to show it. Finally, mom's wish to get that blessing will finally come true. Linyahan ba naman ako ng: "Anak, fulfilled na ako." Yaikksss!!!

Anyway, I usually get up past 12 nn on Sundays but yesterday, I was up even before the hype on the 'Pacquiao-Morales Fight' welled up. And Divisoria was once again an ideal target for terrorists to put a bomb scare on -- daming tao! And they say the Philippines is a very poor country; but judging the crowd [there] who were shopping as if there is no tomorrow, I would say it's bullshit.

Didn't buy anything for myself. My mom even paid for my snacks. Geez, I'm becoming too poor. I am actually saving up because I wanted to buy them something but I don't know where my money would take me... this sucks. Plus, I think I need a new dress. I would have to wear something decent to their blessing, right?

***

Anyway, I hope this week would turn out right. I have lots of things to do -- way way over my head but I know I can do them. I just need some motivation (^_^)

Classic Dialogue

This morning, I had the urge to buy a Starbucks drink (for the sticker... tee-hee!) My kuya is too kind to offer to treat me to a Toffe Nut Latte (",)

Gela and I had a "Quotable" dialogue before Chin Chin and I went to buy our coffee indulgence. It went something like this:
Thet: Gela, baba na kami... anong gusto mong pasalubong, tissue or stirer? *hehe* Gela: Tissue. (thinks) Ay, stirer na lang...

Tsk... tsk... Classic.

As of today: Got four stickers pa lang... =)

Crybaby

Funny, naiyak ako habang nakikinig ng "My Grown Up Christmas List" ni Kelly Clarkson.

I don't know. Siguro masyado lang akong emotional na tao. Sa katunayan, madaming kanta yung 'pag naririnig ko e naiiyak ako -- ng wala namang kinalaman sa current issues ko sa buhay. Iyakin lang talaga ako.

Pero come to think of it, I haven't actually cried in a long time now. 'Yun bang tipong hagulgol, tulo luha, sipon, laway at kung anong anik-anik. (Hehe... OA na yung laway...eewww) Promise, last time yata e a year ago... nung gabi ng kagagahan ko... haha.

Here's Clay Aiken's version... ganda din... sniff... sniff...

Work is no fun no more...

Today, I came to work late as usual. It was already 9:15 when I logged in. My mind is still full of haze and I can't think straight. All I know is that I'm pissed off that I'm already making a habit out of my tardiness... tsk... tsk... bad. I always try consoling myself that it really doesn't matter if I'm late or night because I often compensate by staying late just to finish what needs to be done for the day. But still, it does make me feel bad.

The funny thing is that whenever I wake up each morning, I care less and less about work... I knew I lost my motivation and I do not know how to regain it. (err... a salary increase might help... hehe). I know myself; once i lose it, i can never take it back.

But yea, here I am, trying with all my might to finish my unfinished business -- the 2nd issue of AQ. On my way here, I kept thinking how those pricks could actually be heartless and just let me do this work by myself. Sure I have my layout artist and Jennie and [yea] chocnut but really, they aren't much help when it comes to developing the entire content of the magazine. I need someone whom I can split half of the writing job with and someone who can do interviews with people we need featured in the magazine or at least do the basic proofreading for me. Because at this point in time, I am doing them all and I'm getting tired... I can only do so much you know.

Plus, the gap-tooth schmuck is back -- what else can I ask for, huh? Bad. Bad. Bad.

Adik...

The time now is 7:46 pm, Saturday... Saturday?!?!?!

Yep... at dahil adik ako... i'm still in my workstation...

Be going home in a while... (^_^)

An Ode to ChinChin (Happy Birthday!)

ChinChin, Chen, Cristine... whatever you call her. She's that sweet lady who can charm anybody who walks on two legs (yea, probably kahit four legs pa, kahit nga yung laging naka-headstand e--- di ba, paa? hehe).

Anyway, a year and a half may not be too long but I feel like knowing you forever. Maybe because you carry within you an aura of transparency, a sensitivity that makes the world laugh and cry with you at the same time.

I remember the first time I met you...'kala ko di ka marunong mag-tagalog... nag-iisip na ko kung sa'n ako huhugot ng English =) Nah, but seriously, the first time I saw you, I know we will be friends... I hope we'll be friends forever... and ever... and ever.


I like the way we see things on parallel perspectives... (oo na, kahit mas matanda ako sa'yo... ng eight months lang!) It's funny how our wavelengths meet... nakakaaliw... minsan parang magic.

You sure are a cry baby but we know that within that 'kutis porcelanang China' is a toughie... sobrang strong ng personality ni bruha... hehe. Otherwise, you wouldn't be that Cristine that we know and we love...

Four days later... HAPPY BIRTHDAY ChinChin!!! MWAH!!!

Just like now.

Yey... I was able to finish a whole novel during the weekend. I've been wanting to read more but I usually find myself staring [blankly] at a book whenever I start flipping through its pages. I am becoming more and more a lazy reader. I remember this guy writing in his blog that if you want to be a good writer, you have to be a good reader. I love reading alright; but sometimes, I'm just caught up in too much work, hatred about work, hatred about almost everything associated with it that I lose interest in reading... rather, I write. I write furiously and almost in a nonsense pallor that my pieces are becoming too irrational when I re-read them. Point is, I'm starting to lose the whole point of it. But anyway, I am too overwhelmed, I started reading yet another Mary Higgins-Clark novel right away. I swear, not too many people may appreciate her, but I like her style. She's a more subdued version of Sidney Sheldon. (I think).

***

Anyway, the heat is coming up to my brains (see previous blog). I'm starting to be too irritated and agitated about almost the simplest and smallest of things. I hope nobody talks to me right now; else, the poor soul would be in a lot of treat (if you know what I mean). I used to be really moody when I was in secondary. I grew out of it when I started working. I realized I needed to be more rational if I want to belong and if I want friends. But really, I can't help it when sometimes, I snap out of a situation because somebody or someone triggers me. Just like now... You're really a schmuck, you know that?!?

***

I want to go home and sleep for the rest of the day. These are the days when I feel like not doing anything at all but write, rant and rave about what pisses me off. And now I also feel like a loser. =(

Whatta Monday.

I wonder what this week has in-store for me.

I've been quite a sleazebag in the last couple of days (weeks actually), after loosing my 'heart' at work. Hmm... how to put it? I just probably felt that working here is pointless. Totally worthless... all my efforts are being flushed down the drain right before my big eyes... sucks. But I've never been happier after a gap tooth schmuck-free week... never been happy. I hope he never comes back.

Seriously.

But hey, despite my overly thinning motivation at work, I still am able to pull a few a strings for the second issue of Asian Quality Magazine -- poor baby. It's good that I love this magazine so much to just let it die a natural death. Mom-me will be miserable... kidding.

To be honest, I am becoming to skeptical about this whole AQ thing. Sad but true. For one, I can't get the support that I need from those people I am actually counting on (well, financially and bureaucratically speaking!). Second, I am working with a**holes... excluding Jen, of course... she's actually one of those people who are keeping me sane all this time. A**holes, you know who you are. Third, seriously.... I 'd rather keep my mouth shut.

Haay... I am looking forward to a happy week... another a**hole-free week. Looks like, I'm wrong. Monday morning and the office (the aircon) is all f**ked up! I feel like being roasted inside a mammoth oven. I know, this place is actually living up to its reputation -- a hell on earth.

Seriously. Why am I being bitchy?

Gloom

I feel pretty bad today.
I feel sad. I feel hopeless. I feel disregarded. I feel Unimportant. I feel neglected.
I feel so unpretty; I feel like nobody likes me.
I feel like a trash, a dump, a garbage.
I feel so alone. I feel like an alien to this cold cold room.
I feel isolated. I feel totally all by myself.
I feel cold. I feel empty.
I feel death crawling inside me.

Kitten vs ChocNut

I need to sign up for Anger Management Sessions.

Just this afternoon, a little past lunch, my immediate superior and I re-lived World War II.

Yes, I was so angry I kind of raised my voice at him. We were arguing right in front of our bewildered colleagues. I guess it's a really bad thing to do - answer back to my superior. But I really just can't help it. He was already talking nonsense and I felt like he was questioning my capability when it comes to decision-making. I feel like he's over-exaggerating things and he's already making a habit out of complicating things, which, by the way, is one of the things I HATE the most.

Not to mention, all these Asian Quality stuffs (my looooooong list of things to do) are way way over above my head and the last thing that I need was him telling me what I should and should not do. It's unfair because I feel like he's not doing enough. Thus, I tend to question his capability to be a good example to me. How can the blind lead the blind? (although I am sure I am not)

But anyway, we sat and talked about it (in a more amicable tone). But really, I can't see the point. I admit I am wrong in answering back; i felt like I did not respect him. My bad. I didn't apologize though. Not prepared to do so.

The funny thing with him and me is that our arguments are becoming routinary. We talk then we argue. Then that's it... we walk off as if nothing happened. He says I am narrow-minded and I keep on blocking other's opinions. The way I see it, he's also like that. He listens to everybody's opinion but mine. I only present what I know is prevailing in the current publication practice; they aren't just my opinions. They're the reality. Then he says there will always be changes. For me, it's really simple: ba't ko papahirapan ang sarili ko?

Really, I just don't get what he's trying to implore.

Then, not to mention this really hateful guy who thinks he's God's gift to ECCI. The gap-tooth schmuck. HoldenGirl says it all.

This is a bad day.

SA WAKAS... AQ IS HERE!!!

YEHEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

ASIAN QUALITY MAGAZINE IS FINALLY OUT ...

wala, masaya lang ako...
pati si bear masaya...
kaming lahat masaya...

on the other hand, medyo (syempre) there are certain parts in the magazine that looks like sh*t... the quality of the print is not that good. As my friend Gela brutally puts it: Hindi siya mukhang international magazine. Hey, I'm talking about the quality of the print ha... not the content... grrr... (defensive)

the boss says: darn, he's now obliged to give me a raise... tee-hee... wish ko lang... sana di drawing... but of course, may mga premonitions na na mas magiging madugo ang second issue... wish me luck...

And so?

12:57 pm

Yes, it's Tuesday... lunchtime already but I haven't had a glimpse of Asian Quality yet... ginagalit yata talaga ko ng printer ah... grrr... Anyway, nothing to do but wait. I can practically hear Guns 'N Roses singing "All we need is just a little patienceeeee" (haaay Lord, if you're listening right now, just give me that... just this once... malapit na talaga akong sumabog)

***

Anyway, while lazily browsing the net (for blogs) I came across an old [estranged] friend's blog. It saddens me actualy to realize that it's been almost 2 (or 3 yrs?) since we last talked like friends. As she puts it: it's been long since she gave up our friendship to help her move on from a very unpretty experience with an old flame [which happens to be one of my best buddies].

I didn't even remembered her birthday like I used to. It's really sad. Though I still wish her all the happiness in life, every achievement that she deserves and finally, a peaceful and serene life with the people she loves even if it means completely cutting me off her life.

But I am thankful that somehow she remembers me, she misses our friendship like the way I miss it. I miss it terribly in fact that instead of going through the hurt all over again, I choose to shun it out of my thoughts. But then, fate lets me read this and I feel the hurt again. I miss her.

I remembered this last blog I wrote about her:

About an old friend (... i miss dearly)

Normally, i would care less about a whole lot of things that i know would not really do me any good. I harbored the idea when once in my life i got really pissed off at someone, got offended, cried like it would never end and felt like a total loser. Consequently, i got mad [at myself] for succumbing to that conquest and i promised myself i would never let it happen again. I want to be tough and forego that 'cry baby' i once used to be. As they say, "No more Ms. Nice Girl"

But being nice and being sensitive are two entirely different things. I can be mean but still be sensitive to the idea of me hurting people (although some people can really be intoxicated by an utter lack of disrespect of others like this queen bitch i know... die bitch... die!!! hehe.. sorry, got carried away). I hate the idea of hurting. I hurt before because of so many things; the usual experiences a person goes through (maybe once or twice) in his lifetime, which i am thankful for because they eventually made me more enduring and faithful. So where am i leading?

While lazily browsing the net, an old friend came into mind. She WAS my best friend. (or so she thinks because i haven't given up on her yet). This friendster thing really is something -- it fills the gap of estranged friends, re-builds burnt bridges or, in this one particular odd case, cut loose the thinning thread that trussed me and this old friend. It's hard (and too long) to explain how it did it, but it just did. I used to be angered by the tought of how it all started -- of how one single and absurd entry made her assume that i was turning my back on her. That i was taking sides, got brainwashed, lost my senses -- became a useless friend. I was so hurt it still stings up to now.

She said she had to cut any ties that bound us for her to move from an ugly past to a better life. She said it hurt her too but it just doesn't make any sense. I did not choose to be entangled in a web i did not create. I did not hankered after to be like 'Samson' wedged between those bashing rocks. It was like i was just caught in the middle of a warfare i did not wish to be a part of. I felt so helpless and offended, i didn't even had the chance to defend myself. It was like being left by a long-time boyfriend for another... guy (nah, i mean girl); Only ten times the pain. It was just -- like that.

Has it been a year now? I don't know... i lost track of time. A few months ago, while busy getting on with my life i saw her at the mall (with her mom). It was like seeing her for the first time (that time when we were still in highschool). i really didn't care if she saw me or maybe i was just pretending i didn't. I knew she saw me, even looked at me with a stranger's eyes, an inept glance that needs no words to say 'The hell i care about you!' The world seemed languid at that moment. Then she was gone. After about fifty seconds of self-debate, i decided i needed to talk to her. I am not that kind of friend who just gives up that easy… no, I am not prepared to loose a friend. i ran after her... i browsed the crowd, hoping crazily to spot a girl with that hot pink shirt. i looked everywhere and gave up eventually.

So much for my illusion that we will be alright. Maybe we will… but in another time. Not just now. I still think of her. I miss those times that we saw the world in one paradigm. Where our minds meet and we care much less about other people as long as we are happy. I often think about our usual girly rendezvous -- malling, [window] shopping, one time trip at the spa, plotting on how to conquer the world and other crazy dreams. We even had this one that we will be successful working girls in the land of Uncle Sam. Well, I guess those will just remain at that. But I still smile at those thoughts. I have nothing else but to wish her well and let her know how proud I am of her [surviving the roughest tests of time]. I know she’s well-healed now and I still love her for it.

And now i am living my life for all its worth. I am transferring to a new job, ready to meet people, new friends, while still keeping the old ones. I present myself to the world -- i need not hibernate. Life, it’s too damn short to waste.

Now, we go on with our lives as if nothing happened. I can tell she is happy and God knows how glad I am that she is. Me? I am still struggling -- with my career, with my lovelife, my spiritual life, my family. But I know I'll get there in time.

One thing's for sure, If I see her right now, I'd never hesitate to hug her.

I love you Tuesday (keeping my fingers crossed)

I wish it's Tuesday already... then the misery caused by the 1st issue of ASIAN QUALITY MAGAZINE will be over. Hopefully, the printer would be able to deliver them finally... I swear, my patience is running thin... If patience is a virtue, then it is a virtue I just don't have [well, when it comes to certain things...]

My weekend wasn't at all good. I was literally a bummer. I just didin't feel like doing anything except watch and finish one whole ChiNovela... pathetic life, is it? The printer actually spoiled my day by telling me they couldn't deliver by Monday (which is today). Bunch of schmucks... they don't know how many heartaches have I endured because of this magazine and I thought they could actually be of any help. Turns out, they're the last strike of bitter fate- the merciless one.

As much as I would like to wallow and self-pity and waste my energy complaining, I didn't dare to. It wouldn't make any difference at all anyway... the magazine wouldn't still arrive and it can't bring back any wasted time. So I must wait. As far as I know, I've exerted enough effort for AQ's maiden issue; there is nothing left to squeeze.

What I am worried right now is how to fill up the pages of the second issue considering that out of the 10+ writers that I've been pestering with follow-ups during the last couple of days, only two have stuck to the deadline. The others, Jah knows what happened to their articles. Nevertheless, I will make them suffer -- kukulitin ko sila!

It's just so annoying, some people can't get a clue. I'm really tired explaining [even to those who are not involve] where the magazine is right now. I was seriously considering putting a post in my workstation : "IF YOU'RE GOING TO ASK ME ABOUT ASIAN QUALITY, THINK TWICE, ELSE SUFFER THE REST OF YOUR ECCI LIFE" or "DO NOT DISTURB, BUSY WRITING HIT LIST".

What do you think?

Hay, stupid alzheimers!

Sh*t, I forgot that I have an interview at 10 this morning with Newslink Agency for the Writer / Editor position that I am applying for! Well, I guess it's goodbye Newslink... deep shite!!!!!

I forgot myself then I forgot you
But when I woke up it was never true....

Wala lang, that phrase just popped in my head like that [note: thet snapping her fingers].

Stupid alzheimers always gets me in trouble. I wonder if it's true: old folks used to say a person loses memory everytime he/she takes a peep of his/her bottom while pooping. Yuck no? Whoever came up with that theory is one sick bastard.

Based on experience, I would say Atkin's Diet really does affect one's memory. Take my case for instance: I didn't eat any food with carbs for eight straight days and I noticed I'm becoming more and more forgetful. Well, I know that's already given but at that time, I was at my worst. Explanation is : lack of carbs results to less secretion of glucose - a monosaccharide or simply sugar, the most important carbohydrate in biology. (since when did I became a Science enthusiast?) Sugar supplies energy to the brain and revs up cellular respiration. Thus, without it, our braincells would actually be weak (... daw, malay ko... narinig ko lang yang theory na yan). Anyway, I haven't actually heard someone credible confirm that theory. Nevertheless, I stopped my "Atkin's Diet" and just let "fats be my-fats". (^_^)

Bottomline is I'm pissed I, once again a prisoner of my own crude and unavoidable but equally hateful forgetfulness, let another opportunity slip right through my small hands.

How fitting can it get?

I feel like the world is falling.. just because of the same old issues that've been haunting me even in my sleep. The magazine isn't out yet and it's almost the middle of October. Really, I swear I hate putting the blame on somebody but it's me who's being there in the firing line everytime this magazine is being talked about... "Thet, when will the magazine come out... Thet, our subscribers are already questioning us... Thet, our advertisers are already asking..." Geez, I want a break!!!

When I finished the editorial content and the layout and whent it was approved, I thought my burden will be over... but hey, I was wrong... still half -stuck in deep sh*t... haay...

See what my horoscope says:

Try not to make more of this than there really is. It's very easy to get caught up in a 'The sky is falling!' mentality, but that doesn't help anything in the end. Feel the panic, let it pass, then get down to business.

Wish it's as easy as that... I don't wanna frown too long.

A Day with Jack Canfield (Who wants Chicken Soup?)

Hah! I never thought I could actually see the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" guy in person, lest snatch him for like ten minutes for an ambush interview and have a picture taken with him...

Thanks to my boss [on such rare occassions] I get to attend Jack Canfield's "Personal Excellence & Organizational Success" seminar this morning. Not that I'm a seminar or a conference sucker... in fact there were only two occassions when I attended such that I didn't snooze while at it... this one and Jim Clark's Breakthrough Sessions Seminar, which I attended last July. That guy was also really funny, you'd literally roll down your seats from too much laughing... a very good speaker.

Anyway, Mr. Canfield was super --- his talk was sooo motivating and I did actually enjoyed listening to it. I feel like I learned a lot and mushy as it may sound... I feel renewed (naks!) My goal: to collect all the books he authored... hehe... I wish... his book's pretty expensive but I think they're all worth the investment.

So it was funny, it was like an adrenaline rush... the 5 or 10 minute ambush interview actually turned into a good conversation, not scripted (take note). All in all, it's a nice (kind'a surreal) experience...

These are some of the quotes (mantras) Mr. Canfield mentioned during the seminar which really stuck to my head: (Sorry, can't remember who exactly said them...)

Habits are only enough to get you what you're getting.

If it's meant to be, it's up to me.

You can't hire people to do your push-ups for you.

Clarity is power.

When they say no, say NEXT!

What you put out is what you gonna get.

Small dreams attract small people; big dreams attract big ones.

Winners are those who make a habit of doing things that losers are uncomfortable doing.

Oh what the heck... go for it anyway!

Ask... Ask... Ask... Ask... Ask... Ask... Ask...

And my most favorite?

Some will, Some won't, So what, Someone's waiting!

Kao Jin Yi Dian Dian

This chinese song (from the series It Started With A Kiss) caught my attention. Now, it's been playing nonstop in my head (^_^).

Kao Jin Yi Dian Dian / Come A Little Bit Closer by Lara

I wait quietly behind you
"Mo mo zai ni de sheng hou shou hu de wo"

Really want to see your accidental smile
"duo xiang kan ni bu jing yi de xiao rong"

Maybe you do not understand my heart
"huo xu wo de xin ni bu dong"

But I will try to touch your heart
"wo hui nu li rang ni gan dong"

I'm the clumsy one in your eyes
"zai ni yan zhong you duo me ben zuo de wo"

I will not give up following you
"jue bu fang qi zhui zu ni de zhi zhuo"

I just need you to give me some response
"zhi yao ni neng duo xie hui ying wo"

I will accept a smile or a nod.
"yi ge xiao huo dian tou quan dou jie shou"

Can I come near a little closer
"neng bu neng zai kao jing yi dian dian"

Confess my feelings to you loudly
"da sheng shuo chu ni suo you gan jue"

Don't shut yourself in your own world anymore
"bie zai jin jin guan zai zhi you zi ji de shi jie"

The warm sun welcomes you
"wen nuan tai yang wei ni ying jie"

Can I come near a little closer
"neng bu neng zai kao jing yi dian dian"

Can I be braver a little bit
"neng bu neng zai yong gan yi dian dian"

Even if I know that it will always be a one-sided love affair
"jiu shuan rang wo zhi dao wo yong yuan zi shi dan lian"

I will still keep my gratitude
"wo ye hui chang zhe gan xie"

Smilling to you and say goodbye.
"xiao zhe he ni shuo zai jian"

Here's a preview of the series. It's cute...

Cutest MV ever... Wonderful Life